Homecoming
by madame.alexandra
Summary: Han comes home from deployment. H/L. Identity 'verse.


a/n: Welcome back to the Identity 'verse!

* * *

**_Homecoming  
_12 ABY**

* * *

Leia was convinced that nothing could diminish the beauty of the day.

She could take it all in stride. This morning, after she had fixed Jaina her favorite cereal, Jaina had promptly and inexplicably decided she _actually_ hated that cereal and then, enraged because her mother appeared to be giving more attention to her sister, proceeded to dump her _entire_ bowl of wet cereal on the nursing baby's head - but Leia could take it all in stride.

She could handle Mid-Rim political crises and squabbling senators, angry lobbyists and puerile aristocrats; she could handle pettiness and frustrating negotiations and stalled proposals and painstaking legal arguments. She could handle Aunt Rouge's neuroses and her father's irritating tendency to spoil her oldest daughter rotten, Zozy's inconvenient molting – Jaina thought it was funny to stick the itchy ends of them in Noura's basinet, or tickle the baby's face with them until, confused, Noura started crying – and her role as a main line of support for Winter, who was wading her way through post-partum depression slowly, but surely.

All of it, she could take it all, handle it all, do it all – personal and professional. Nothing the galaxy threw at her today was going to dampen her mood or defeat her, for one single, solitary, and yet utterly uplifting reason:

Today was the day Han came home.

_Home._

Home from deployment; home from his seemingly endless weeks controlling drug interdiction and putting down final, ill-fated Rebellions in the far reaches of space. Home to her, and to Jaina, and to tiny Noura, who was now a pink-faced, blue-eyed, gorgeous and lively six weeks old.

His re-enlistment was over, victory was declared, and in such a short, short time, he would belong completely to Leia once more, and she relished the thought. It buoyed her beyond belief, more so than she'd ever imagined it would. She hadn't repressed her natural inclination to miss him, but she'd had to compartmentalize it and cope somehow, what with her duties on the professional side of things and her newborn, but today was _the day_, and today she let the thrill, and the relief, and the joy, consume her.

She was as giddy as a schoolgirl. For the moment, she was more _wife_ and _mother_ than _Vice Consul_ and _Princess_ and she could not have cared less; if she glowed, then so be it, if she was distracted, she'd make up for it later – the crux of her emotions today was Han's return home, and she had no qualms about it.

She was in her office, though she was working only in the loosest sense of the word. _Strictly_ speaking she was still on maternity leave, though she attended to duties when she needed a break from mothering, or if something was particularly pressing. This morning she'd come in because she knew she'd be restless if she stayed at home; Han was barreling towards Coruscant at light speed, and she couldn't force time to go any faster.

She opted instead for limited office hours, which were even more limited by the fact that she brought Jaina and Noura with her. Considering Jaina's ultimate theatrics this morning – what with the attempted cereal drowning – she'd decided not to delegate their care to someone else.

"Jaina."

Leia looked up at the sound of her father's voice. His tone was kind, but stern, which was guaranteed to be absolutely useless when it came to Jaina.

"Please get off that table," Bail said.

Leia craned her head and peered around her console to see that Jaina had hopped up on the kaf table in the middle of the room and was pretending to tight walk along the edge of it. Leia narrowed her eyes.

"You'll fall, Jainy," Bail said gently. "You don't want that. Come here, now – "

He reached for her, and Jaina leapt away, planting her feet dead center of the table and holding up her hands towards Bail in a cutesy, martial arts style stance. She scrunched her nose at him.

"I can fly," she informed him snidely.

Leia scowled to herself, shaking her head. One time – one _single_ time – Jaina had nearly fallen down the stairs and Leia, reacting as any mother would, had caught her in the nick of time. The difference was that Leia had instinctively lashed out with her Force sensitivity, which had not only steadied Jaina, but lifted her into the air and held her there calmly until Leia had hurried over to grab her.

Jaina, of course, now insisted she was able to fly.

"You can't fly, Jaina," Leia said patiently.

"Can too."

"You know very well that the Force caught you."

"Uncle Lu can fly."

"Backflips are not flying," Leia retorted, "and he should stop doing those for you," she muttered under her breath.

Noura, who was blissfully asleep in a little basket on Leia's desk, made a soft cooing noise.

Leia grinned at her.

Jaina noticed this, and went back to tightrope walking. Bail sighed.

"Darling, it's dangerous," he tried.

"Don't come crying to me when you fall and crack your head open," Leia said.

Jaina turned to glare at her, and then sulkily flung herself down, dragging her feet over to the window to look outside. She pursed her lips in a pout and put her fingers flat against the reinforced glass.

"A bit harsh, don't you think?" Bail mused, arching an eyebrow at her.

Leia smiled wryly at him. She nodded at Noura.

"Perhaps this one will respond to Alderaanian parenting, Father," she sighed dramatically. "Jaina seems all Corellian so far."

"Ahh, then am I to understand you think this little daredevil, stubborn phase she's in will be curbed when Han gets home?"

Leia snorted.

"Phase," she quoted. "Oh, that's so sweet. You think it's a _phase_."

Bail grimaced, but it was a good-natured one. Jaina rose up on her toes and tapped her forehead against the window.

"Hello, people," she said, gazing out over the massive crowds of traffic. "_Hellooooooo_!"

"Don't yell, please," Leia said. "You'll wake your sister."

Jaina turned and shot Leia a wicked look. She whirled about and flounced over to Leia's desk, inching closer. She leaned on Leia's thigh, and tried to crane her neck very far to see into Noura's basket.

"It is daytime," she said sternly. "Wake up time."

"Babies sleep as often as they want," Leia replied. "You know that. We talked about that."

"I want to sleep in the day!" Jaina growled.

"You are more than welcome to sleep during the day," Leia said, reaching down to stroke her hair. "That is called a nap."

Jaina lurched away as if she'd been had, giving Leia an accusing look. She seemed outraged to discover that the thing she so resisted lately – the dreaded nap – was, in fact, nothing more than the same sleeping-during-the-day babies got to do. She narrowed her eyes furiously, and Bail let out a quiet laugh.

Jaina hopped forward again, put one foot on the leg of Leia's chair, pulled herself up towards the desk, and reached over to tickle Noura's foot. Leia twitched her arm, instinctively getting ready to swat Jaina's hand away, but thought better of it and just sighed.

Noura squirmed, and opened her eyes.

"Jaina Yvaine," Leia groaned quietly.

Jaina drew her hand back triumphantly, wriggling her fingers.

"Naps are for babies, Nor," she advised her sister. "We big girls."

Bail stood up, shaking his head.

"Jainy, your mother is trying to work."

Jaina pointed at Leia's screen.

"Nuh-uh, there is Daddy's face, not work," she accused.

"Snitch," Leia whispered to her, arching a brow affectionately.

Bail shot her a look, and Leia leaned back, shrugging. She was scrolling through images of Han on her terminal, amusing herself with them. Some were personal photos, some where press photos that he and Leia had particularly good laughs over – when it came down to it, she could think of nothing but tonight, nothing but Han walking through the front door.

Leia sat forward and picked up Noura, settling her in the crook of her arm. She got up and walked around her desk, leaning on the edge of it with the baby snugly cradled. Jaina skipped over to Bail.

"If you really want to tightrope walk, I can hold your hand while you walk around on top of things," he offered.

By way of agreement, Jaina extended her hand to him with a smug smile. He lifted her up onto the table steadily, and Leia watched, idly rocking Noura just slightly.

"You're sure you don't want me to take them for the night?" Bail offered earnestly. "I don't ever mind."

Leia shifted Noura to her shoulder, resting her so that the baby's heartbeat was aligned over top hers. She shook her head.

"I appreciate the offer," she said, declining again. "You know, I think at one point, I might have taken you up on it but…I just can't see Han being happy if he had to wait another day to see them."

She tilted her head, smirking.

"That isn't to say he _wouldn't_ be happy to have me alone," she added wryly. "It's just – well, you know how it is," she said, shrugging lightly.

She had never been gone for long stretches of time when they only had Jaina, but she'd taken short, inter-planetary trips, and she'd never wanted to put off seeing Jaina in favor of Han. She knew he probably felt the same thing – they had had so much time with just each other, and they knew that they would always find that time again, but time with their children felt so _precious_.

They grew up so fast. Han had marveled over the tiniest of _Jaina_ things he'd missed when he was gone while Leia was pregnant with Noura; she knew he'd be eager to get his hands on Noura right away.

She was still brand new to him, after all. For her whole life – though it was just beginning – he'd seen her primarily in ultrasounds, or in the blue shimmer of a holo call.

"Yes, I suppose I do," Bail murmured, tightening his arm and giving it a little swing.

Jaina giggled madly, skipping along a little faster. He swung her again and drew her up into his arms, settling her on his hip.

"Are you excited to see your father, my little one?" he asked, chucking her under the chin gently.

Jaina threw her head back dramatically, baring her teeth in a delighted grin, and began to nod excitedly. Leia bit her lip, and a surge of adrenaline rushed through her and pricked at her eyes – not that she bothered to hide it. Jaina's unbridled joy was beautiful to see, an exact manifestation of Leia's own excitement – and in her arms, even Noura's heart seemed to flutter faster with the thrill of what was to come.

* * *

Though she didn't want a childfree, private reunion with Han, Leia _did_ want to look nice for him. Since taking on a more massive role within the New Republic, and since motherhood, the times she dressed solely for him were few and far between. She knew Han didn't care. She knew he'd be _more_ than satisfied to see her if he came home to her wearing ripped leggings and a t-shirt, entirely covered in jam and baby powder. It was because he didn't care that she was driven to doll up.

Jaina sat on the counter in the 'fresher and watched with fascinated interest, for once handling being told _no_ with grace each time Leia denied her makeup.

"When can I wear it?" Jaina asked longingly, and Leia arched her brows in the middle, amused. It surprised her that a little girl who loved her scabs and scars so much could so often also be so…girlish.

"Hmmm," Leia hummed, glossing on mascara with a practiced little roll of the wrist. "When you're old enough to understand that looking older does not make you older," she decided wryly.

Jaina swung her legs back and forth and sniffed contemptuously.

"But how many _years_ old?" she pressed.

"How does fifteen sound?" Leia bargained.

Jaina gave a shrug.

"You makes the rules," she said.

Leia snorted. She capped the mascara, and leaned over to kiss Jaina on the nose. She lifted her down, placing her on the floor.

"Skip _right_ into my room and check on Noura," she requested.

Jaina nodded proudly. Leia was perfectly capable of sensing Noura's state, but having Jaina 'help' as much as possible made her feel independent, grown up, and included. Most of the time she loved that, though sometimes she had the opposite reaction to being asked to do big sister things.

Noura was asleep in the cradle Leia kept by her side of the bed. She'd been dozy and placid all evening, which didn't necessarily bode well for the night. Leia didn't want her to sleep herself out before it was even Jaina's bedtime, but then again, she supposed they would all be up late tonight.

Jaina hopped back in as Leia was applying lipstick. She made a pillow out of her hands and pressed it to her cheek, comically miming sleep. She grinned, and scuttled to the counter, reaching up to hold onto it and stare up at Leia.

"Zozy is looking at her," Jaina said. "He protect."

Leia nodded, pursing her lips. Zozy often hopped up on the bed and peered over the side of the cradle when the babies were asleep in there – it was a habit he'd started with Jaina, and had immediately continued.

"Mama, you look pretty," Jaina complimented, grinning. "So, so pretty."

"Thank you," Leia said, eyeing her lipstick. It wasn't a very dark shade, just one of her more flirtatious pinks. She tilted her head at it, then turned, and crouched down to her daughter. "Okay, this one time," she said dramatically. "I'll put this on you," she offered. "But you have to promise me something."

Wriggling with excitement, Jaina nodded, even as Leia gently held her arm to keep her still. She exaggerated pursing her own lips, showing Jaina what to do, and Jaina mimicked her.

"You have to give Daddy _gross_ sloppy kisses all over his face," Leia said solemnly. "I want _allllll_ the lipstick smeared on him, got it?"

Jaina waited until Leia was done, then smacked her lips loudly and nodded fervently. She looked a bit clownish with the lipstick on, but it was cute, and the obvious little joy it gave her was sweet. She twirled around, and then stopped, reaching out to grab Leia's face.

"But," she gasped. "My kisses are too many, none for you!" she said worriedly.

Leia considered her a moment, using her internal mom dictionary to translate that odd sentence. She realized what Jaina meant, and leaned forward to give her a little tickle under the chin.

"Don't worry about that, honey," she said. "If there's no more room, I'll find _somewhere_ to kiss him."

Jaina beamed, and Leia smirked a little. She stood, and dropped her lipstick back into the wooden cosmetic organizer Han had made for her last year, after a mopey, Noura-hormone induced fit had her crying over how messy her makeup drawer was.

She checked her reflection, tucking wispy curled tendrils of hair back behind her ears. Han liked her hair down, so that was how she'd left it, though she'd braided some loose, decorative strands in to hold it softly back from her face. She was barefoot – no amount of dressing up would bid her to wear shoes in her own him – but she had chosen a short jumpsuit that she normally wouldn't have wasted just around the house. It hit her mid thigh, and had a blowsy, plunging neckline – double useful these days in that it was, naturally, quite eye-catching, but also happened to be rather convenient for breastfeeding.

Jaina reached up, and Leia obliged her, settling her on her hip.

"Mama," Jaina said suddenly. "What if Daddy doesn't 'member us?" she asked, bobbing her head as Leia carried her into the bedroom.

"He will," Leia assured her. "We talked to him on the holos a lot. And your father has a very good memory. He'd never forget any of us."

Jaina drew a hand over her forehead as if to say – _whew_! Leia's heart raced a little faster as she glanced at the chronos. She didn't know an exact time; Han had plenty of return planning to deal with on the journey back and the final approach, but she knew he'd get back early and finish up administrative things in the next few days.

With ever passing minute, the ache with which she'd missed him got stronger. She had let it run wild all day, so relieved that it would be over, that that undercurrent of constantly missing him was about to go away, that she swore she'd missed him more today than the entire time he'd been gone.

He was just so close, so, so close, and of course, with that knowledge came the lurking, dreadful fear that something might go wrong, and snatch him away from her at this anticipated moment –

She drew the curtains on those thoughts; less they bleed into the psyches of her children, or ruin her mood.

Han would be fine. He always was.

Zozy stood up on the bed when he saw them, wagging his tail and giving some of his signature, happy chirps. Two colourful feathers drifted off his coat and floated to the ground, and Jaina straightened her body and forcibly slid down Leia's side until she was released, eager to collect them.

Leia stroked Zozy's ears, and sat down next to him, leaning forward to peer down at Noura. The baby slept on her back, with her legs straight out and her arms straight over her head, and Leia pressed her fingers to her lips to suppress a laugh.

There were some days when motherhood could be impossible. Utterly impossible – exhausting, irritating, trying, and generally demoralizing, but today was one of those days on which she was infatuated with every facet of it. Her little girls were angels, and everything they did, everything about them, was holy.

Noura scrunched her nose and whimpered, and Leia reached in the cradle to pick her up. Noura blinked hazily, curious, but let Leia settle her against her shoulder and squeaked contently.

"Let's go downstairs," Leia suggested.

"C'mere, Zozy!" Jaina commanded, and the Mooka flew off the bed and into her outstretched arms, predictably knocking her flat on her bottom.

Leia shook her head.

"You're both going to get hurt doing that," she murmured, resigned to it.

"Prove it!" Jaina challenged, scrambling up with Zozy. Both of them darted out of the room for the stairs, and a second later Leia heard his paws as he hurtled down the stairs easily.

"Jaina," she said sharply. "Hold on to that railing!"

"I am!" Jaina whined back.

A consistent smacking sound followed, which indicated Jaina was merely slapping the columns as she trundled along, patronizing her mother and once again tempting fate. Leia hurried after her, frowning, and caught her halfway down the stairs.

Thwarting Jaina's stubborn attempt to trip herself down the stairs once more, Leia grabbed one of her hands and laced her fingers against Jaina's. Jaina tried to wrench away, outraged, and Leia shook her head.

"You want to spend your father's first night back home in the Med Centre? In a _full_ body cast? _All_ your bones broken? All your _teeth_ gone?" she asked dramatically.

Jaina giggled at the threats. She clicked her teeth.

"No, thanks."

"Thought so," Leia said, and swung Jaina easily off the bottom step before she let her loose.

Jaina scampered off to find Zozy, admonishing him for not waiting for her on the stairs. Leia moved the baby from her shoulder to the crook of her arm, and Noura peered up at her with solemn blue eyes, her expression uncertain.

"I know," Leia sympathized softly. "All these emotions are a lot for you."

She cupped a palm around Noura's head affectionately and carried her into the sitting room, giving a cursory look around at her feet to avoid stepping on stray toys. Zozy darted through, zooming under the kaf table, something clutched in his jaws. Jaina ran by a moment later, chasing him, raising her voice.

"ZOZY TOOK MY STUFFY!" she screeched.

Leia glared after her.

"Don't _yell_!" she reprimanded, then cringing, because she'd yelled a little to make sure Jaina heard her from the living room.

Noura blinked at her for a moment, and then began to fuss – and it seemed a very deliberate fussing, as if to make a point to her mother and sister.

"ZOZY, GIVE BACK!" Jaina ordered uselessly, making another round.

"Stop running," Leia said, turning sharply. She tried to reach out and grab Jaina. "Jaina, _stop_ – "

Jaina evaded her and kept chasing. Leia rolled her eyes and collapsed on the sofa; Noura was rooting around in the fabric of her jumpsuit – of course she was, it was like she sensed that Leia was trying to intervene in Jaina's death defying stunts.

Coming through the sitting room again, Jaina lunged at Zozy in a spectacular pounce and tumbled over him, engaging in a game of tug with the toy.

"His teeth are going to scrape you and you're going to whine about it again," Leia warned.

"Zozy," growled Jaina, ignoring Leia.

Zozy suddenly let go of the stuffed toy, and Jaina flew backwards and popped the back of her head on the kaf table. Leia watched the scene incredulously, preoccupied trying to get Noura's head untangled from her clothing and against her breast.

Jaina rubbed the back of her head, frowning almost sheepishly.

"Blast," she swore darkly.

"_Jaina_!"

Leia shook her head pointedly – and with Han gone these past few weeks, who on earth was using that language in front of her daughter?! There was veritably no one to blame it on –

Jaina stuck out her tongue.

"Baba says it," she argued.

Leia widened her eyes, leaning forward, managing to fix Jaina with a stern look while also coaxing Noura to latch on.

"No, ma'am," she said firmly. "You do _not_ talk like that."

Jaina opened her mouth to retort, but the sound of chimes interrupted her and she fell silent, her mouth hanging still as she whipped towards the door. They weren't alert bells; they were entry chimes.

Entry chimes, and entry chimes meant –

"DADDY!" screamed Jaina, leaping to her feet.

Leia, too, almost leapt to her feet, but at the jolting movement, Noura kicked her feet angrily and wrenched her head to the side, angrily howling her disapproval, and Leia sank back down, her heart racing, immediately helping Noura resituate.

She watched Jaina begin to jump up and down, prancing towards the entrance to the sitting room, and then she took off down the hall, and Leia sat, her heart beating in her throat, her eyes fixed.

Was he early? She didn't know when she'd expected him. Of course it was chaos when he walked in the door. Of course she was trapped on the couch with a nursing baby, and Jaina was free to throw herself at him –

She sat back, unable to take her eyes off the hallway, waiting, waiting for him to walk around that corner.

* * *

Han's hands shook imperceptibly as he keyed in his home access code. He'd unblocked every emotion he'd been forced to keep in check while he ran this grueling interdiction, and for an intense moment, he felt everything he'd moderated while he was gone.

He froze, overwhelmed with it, his finger lingering over the final key – he'd had no idea. He'd had no idea he could miss someone – _three_ someones – so much. He'd missed Leia before. He'd missed Jaina before – but this had been hard.

He missed Noura, he missed all the things she must have done while he was gone even though she was barely six weeks old; he'd missed helping with the bad nights and he'd missed the exhaustion and he'd – he'd just grown so accustomed to always being home, life beyond the military, that this had felt more isolating than he had anticipated.

He was on the verge of seeing them, all of them, in the flesh – not just in the shimmery, hollowed out holo images. He wanted it so badly it hurt, and for a moment before he walked in, he had to feel all of it.

He took a deep breathed, keyed the final symbol, and opened the door.

Immediately, he saw Zozy's perky snout pop around the corner with curiosity, his tongue lolling out. Barely a second later, Jaina's ecstatic cry echoed down the hallway.

"DADDY!"

Han let the door shut behind him. He crouched and spared a few head rubs for Zozy as the little guy trotted up to meet him, but when he straightened up and saw Jaina come barreling around the corner, running towards him, arms outstretched, he burst into an splitting grin, a grin so magnificent it made every muscle in his face ache.

He met her at the end of the hall, his throat closing up, and picked her up in one swift motion, smoothing his head over her hair. He held her close, wrapping his arms around her, and stepping around the corner into the living room. He kissed her forehead and hugged her protectively, his grip tightening in perhaps the tightest hug he'd ever given her.

He buried his face in her hair, breathing her in, and his ears rang with silence for a moment. Home. He was _home_. He was home for good, and Jaina was bright and vivacious and just as he remembered her, just as he'd missed her.

She fidgeted after a moment, shoving her feet gently at Han's ribs. She squirmed a little more, and then opened her mouth, and sunk her teeth into his shoulder gently with a little wine.

Han furrowed his brow, and laughed, and then Leia's voice broke in.

"Han, Han," she said softly, her voice so close, and so clear and pure, so different from the tinny impersonal hum of the holo. "You're scaring her a little," she warned, her tone apologetic.

Jaina was over the moon to see him again, but she misinterpreted his overwhelming affection, his tight, secure grip, as something alarming. She thought it indicated she must have done something wrong.

Han nodded, affected both by Leia's voice, and Jaina's excitement. He loosened his arms and leaned his head back, his throat growing tighter. He nudged Jaina under her chin and smoothed her hair back again, studying her perfect little face. His eyes. Leia's nose. That smug, sly glint in her eye that was all her own – _kriff_, he'd missed her.

"Sorry, Jainy," he murmured.

He swallowed hard, trying to force the lump out of his throat.

Finally. He was finally, finally home. He'd had to compartmentalize so much, focus on the mission, keep his decision making clear and strategic – and now all that was gone, and he wasn't a soldier anymore, he was just Jaina's father, and Noura's father, and Leia's husband –

He couldn't resist kissing her forehead again.

"Missed you, kid," he said hoarsely. "Missed you a whole lot, you know that?"

Jaina reached up and patted his cheek.

"Daddy, how come you have tears?" she asked.

Han shook his head and pretended to bite her fingers, clearing his throat.

"M'not! I don't!" he protested.

Jaina winked one eye and glared at him suspiciously.

"Nope," he insisted, lying through his teeth. He pressed his cheek to her hair to rub off some of the wetness on his face. "Not me," he said gruffly, shifting her to his hip and stepping into the room.

His eyes fell on Leia, and his throat constricted all over again. Why did it feel like he'd been gone for years and years? In the grand scheme it hadn't been so long, but she'd just had a baby when he left and, and –

She looked up at him from the sofa, and her eyes met his. He caught his breath quietly, and she settled back a little primly, one leg crossed over the other, Noura tucked against her breast.

She lifted one shoulder helplessly, compressing her lips.

"Be aware that I fully planned on throwing myself at you and climbing you like a tree," she quipped, nodding down at the baby. "She overruled that."

Han approached slowly, his brow furrowed with awe. He sat down next to her gently, clutching Jaina so they wouldn't jostle Leia too much. He settled the toddler on his lap and peered down into Leia's arms.

"You tryin' to tell me _this_ is Noura?" he joked, feigning suspicions in a constricted voice. "Nah. Can't be," he said. "She's too big," his voice caught again.

Jaina tugged on his collar.

"Yes, that is her," she informed him, with solemn, three-year-old gravity. "She is _still_ here."

Han gave Jaina an amused look, lifting his elbow to wipe his face on his shirt. He tucked Jaina's head into his shoulder, ruffling her hair gently, and leaned back into the sofa, and into Leia, restless, hoping Noura might finish nursing soon. Six weeks had been far too long to go without holding her – and Leia too, he _needed_ to hold Leia.

It was a frustrating beauty of parenthood – he and Leia alone took a backseat, for now, to the greater unit of the Solo family as a whole.

And he wouldn't change it. He didn't resent it.

Leia turned her head up to look at him, smiling softly. He reached up and touched her face, his thumb brushing her lip and her cheek affectionately.

"Hey, Sweetheart," he greeted huskily. "How ya been?" he asked, and somehow, infused seven years of meaning and romance into that one simple question, asking everything that needed to be asked, offering all the support he'd been unable to give while he was gone.

Lea turned her head slightly, and kissed his palm. Lipstick smeared across it and he grinned at her, eyes glimmering.

"Good," she whispered firmly.

"I love you," Han said.

"Mmhm. I know, honey."

He leaned over to press his nose into her temple, and Leia shifted, catching his eye.

"She's finished," she told him. "You want to trade?" she asked, nodding wryly at Jaina.

Han nodded, biting the inside of his lip. It wasn't as if he'd never seen Noura – for sith's sake, he'd been there for her birth – but this still felt so monumental. What if she screamed when he held her? What if he'd missed all the chances he had to bond with her, and she was alienated from him for the rest of her life –

"Jaina, what on earth – "

"I'm trading," Jaina whined, crawling from Han's lap into Leia's, jostling both of her parents and the baby.

Han quickly turned a little so Leia could lift her arms and hand him the baby; Jaina head-butted Leia's elbow and tried to situate herself in Leia's lap amidst the baby hand off, creating a graceless tangle.

"Would you let me – please – get my breast back…in my shirt," Leia grumbled at Jaina, trying to readjust the blouse as Jaina blithely claimed a spot. "I am trying to put myself right," she informed Jaina.

"I can do it," Jaina said brightly, knocking Leia's hand out of the way and then trying to readjust Leia's fabric herself.

"No, Jaina – "

"I can put it back for you," Jaina whined.

She poked Leia hard, and Leia winced, nudging her away.

"What if we just left it out?" Han suggested, deadpan

Leia kicked him, her nose turning pink.

"You _wait_," she breathed quietly, finally shrugging her clothing back into place and sitting back coolly as if nothing had gone amiss.

Jaina cocked her head happily, and Han looked between them, unable to keep himself from laughing. It was so – so incongruous to what he ever thought his life would be, and it was better than anything he'd ever wanted. This was his life, Han Solo's life, the man who'd once been a street urchin, a criminal, a gun for hire, and his life was sitting on this sofa, watching his toddler try to shove his wife's breast back into her blouse.

His wife the princess, the princess who ran the galaxy. It was –

Noura turned her head, fussing quietly. She kicked her feet and pressed a fist into Han's chest, suddenly looking up at him warily. He brought her closer to his chest, willing her to remember him, thinking – _don't cry. Don't cry, Sweetheart, it's me. You know me._

Leia reached over and touched Noura's foot lightly, soothing her; _reminding_ her. Noura, though, did not seem to need the reminder. She studied Han carefully, staring at him – she had such a serious gaze for a baby – and he waited to be judged, all the while marveling at how much she'd grown, how beautiful she was – how somehow, even though her eyes were so blue, she looked quite like Leia.

Jaina leaned over and gently patted Noura's stomach.

"This is Daddy," Jaina said firmly.

"She knows," Leia said quietly.

"Yeah, she knows," Han said gruffly. "You know, don't you?" he asked, lifting her up.

Very gently, he kissed her nose, and then drew back to wait for her reaction. Noura stretched, throwing her arms over her head, and then scrunched back up, and tilted her head at him, and smiled.

Leia kissed Han's shoulder, and squeezed his elbow tightly.

"That's her first smile, Han," she murmured. "She _knows_ you."

Han smiled back. It was all he was capable of for the moment – only a smile. Noura cooed almost primly, perhaps proud of her awareness, and the world felt so small for a quiet moment, so small and safe; all he needed was the three of them.

Then Jaina lurched up, digging her bony knees into Leia's lap, a stricken look on her face.

"I forgot!" she moaned, and lunged forward to kiss Han's cheek. She did so once more, and then inched closer, attacking him with kisses. "I have to! Mommy said!" she informed him, showing surprising care in avoiding her sister as she continued to onslaught.

Leia covered her mouth, watching with glee, and then the next thing she knew she was crying, because Han looked so cute, sitting there with the baby in his arms, and a bewildered, flattered look on his face.

"Leia," he said, trying to see around Jaina's aggressive campaign. "Leia, don't cry – here – "

He tried to extend a hand, but he couldn't get around Jaina, and Leia leaned forward, laughing and she smoothed tears away.

"I'm fine, Han," she choked out, and she'd never meant anything more in her life, she'd never been so sincere – this was a perfect moment, a perfect reunion; the kids ran it, the kids came first.

They'd have later for just each other.

* * *

It was no surprise that they got to bed late. Jaina was excitable, Noura was over stimulated – yet it was incredible how quickly Han fell back into the routine of bedtime. He followed her instructions regarding how it usually went, and he performed his part with a slightly furrowed brow, and a bit of a frown; she could almost hear him wondering to himself – _how was she doing this by herself?_

She wanted to laugh, but with him here, she was asking herself the same thing, because suddenly, it was so, so much easier.

And when bedtime was all said and done – and Jaina had _finally_ been convinced to go to sleep, because Daddy was going to still be there in the morning – Leia was able to relax into a tangle of limbs with Han, quietly enjoying the intimacy of his weight on her, though tonight – with the baby in a cradle by the bed – a sexual nexus was absent.

Absent, and unnecessary to express what they were feeling.

She turned slightly, watching as he leaned over the edge of the bed, staring into the cradle. She stroked her hand over his bare shoulder, wrapping one of her ankles around his leg, and sighed softly, letting her head loll against his arm. She kissed him there, and smirked.

"I'm here to be stared at, too," she reminded him wryly.

Han turned, grinning. He lowered his head and touched his forehead to her temple.

"I like that she sleeps like that," he said gruffly, enchanted by Noura's feet-straight-out, arms-flung-up affectation. "It's cute."

"Oh, she's very cute," Leia murmured in agreement, tracing her hand down Han's chest. She splayed her fingers over a freshly healed scar just near his hip, and clicked her tongue softly. "What's this?"

"Nothin'. Flesh wound."

"_Han_."

"It was a laser bolt. Shallow. Got it on the last boarding we conducted," he told her.

Leia pursed her lips. She sighed.

"It was nothin'," Han insisted. "Or I woulda told you. Knew I'd be fine." He kissed her cheek. "Didn't want you to worry," he murmured.

She let her hand slip off the healed wound, and touched his jaw fleetingly. She shifted her knee, nudging his hip a little, and he rolled to the side, giving her space to sprawl over top of him, trading places. She folded her arms across his chest and rested her head on them, closing her eyes.

"Am I heavier?" she asked.

"No," he said, running his fingers through her hair. He kissed her shoulder. "I missed you."

She mumbled the same sentiment into her hands, sleepy and content.

"I miss anything good?" he asked huskily.

She shook her head.

"Just six weeks of Noura," Han mumbled. He shrugged. "Well, that's it, then, we just gotta have another one," he joked.

Leia dug her knee into his thigh and he laughed quietly, pinching her ribs affectionately. She muffled a giggle, and lifted her head to eye him, running her palm along his jaw.

"Someday," she agreed.

"You should get some sleep," Han told her. "Your work – "

"I'm not going in tomorrow," Leia interrupted, incredulous. "I took the rest of the week, barring absolute emergencies."

Han paused. He cocked his head at her.

"You thought I wouldn't?" she asked.

He hesitated.

"Dunno," he said slowly. "You sorta went back to the office quick after Noura," he pointed out.

"Well, you were gone," she said. "I was restless after Jaina. I took too much time – in _my_ opinion, _I_ wanted to go back," she said, tapping her own chest lightly. "And I knew if I sat around at home with Noura and Jaina, I'd miss you more, I'd get even more restless – I am not cut out for stay-at-home-motherhood. And Noura's very, _very_ calm."

Han smiled.

"The rest of the week, huh?"

She nodded.

"Any chance of Bail takin' the kids one night?"

"Ahh, he's already offered," Leia said. "He offered to take them tonight, even."

Han clutched her hips.

"Glad you didn't let him."

"I _knew_ you'd feel that way," she said smugly.

"'Cause you know me."

She nodded, and tapped his nose with her finger, giving a secretive little roll of her eyes. Sentimentality was something they kept very private, between just the two of them, and they still made fun of each other for it.

"How was it, really?" he asked after a moment, tilting his head at her. "Me bein' gone?"

Leia stroked is jaw for a moment, and then she rolled off of him. She stretched out next to him on her side, resting her arm over his chest, and propping her elbow up to support her head. She thought about it for a moment, and then breathed out quietly.

"It was stressful," she said honestly. "Jobal came to stay for two weeks. That was helpful – we bonded quite a bit. Father and Rouge and…well, everyone was around to help. I wasn't alone. But they…irritated me, sometimes," she admitted softly. "And it wasn't their fault. It was only that I was annoyed they were standing in _your_ place."

Han lifted his head and started to speak, guilt streaking across his face, and she shook her head at him.

"This isn't an indictment of you," she said. "I wanted you to take this mission. The Republic needed it. Carlist needed _you_. And you cannot be the only parent who never does anything _but_ parent."

She licked her lips.

"I was jealous for you," she admitted softly. "If Noura quieted as soon as Luke took her, or when she sneezed for the first time on Father…I wanted it to be you. And then I'd get irritated, and want to be alone with the girls."

She sighed.

"But it was hard being alone."

Han slid his hand over hers and squeezed it.

"Yeah," he said slowly. "I know."

"Do you?"

"Sure, Leia," he murmured. He paused, then cringed at himself, and went on. "So, uh, you r'member when Jaina walked for the first time, in the gardens outside?"

Leia blinked at him suspiciously, but nodded.

Han winced.

"That, uh…wasn't the first time she walked."

Leia's mouth fell open.

"Wasn't the second or third time, either," Han confessed. "She'd been doin' it a few days. I just didn't want you to feel bad," he said. "And…I was...I dunno, mad at myself for letting you miss it."

Leia glared at him lightly. He licked his lips.

"I get what you're sayin'," he told her. "Y'know, you…didn't want anyone else to share in their milestones until I did. I kinda felt the same."

"She walked in front of someone else? Before just me and you in the garden?" Leia asked.

"Oh, yeah. She walked to Chewie on the _Falcon_. Twice. I told him if he mentioned it to you, I'd shave him bald."

Leia swatted his shoulder playfully, and bit her lip.

"Yes, well," she agreed. "It's like that. It's _that_ feeling."

Han brought her palm to his mouth and kissed it. He let his head fall back heavily and closed his eyes. Nothing felt better than being home. He felt as if there was nothing weighing him done, nothing at all. This was just bliss in its simplest, purest form.

Leia shifted her head slightly, and pressed her lips to his ear.

"Are your sweatpants on the floor?" she asked.

Eyes closed, he nodded.

"Put them on," she suggested.

He opened one eye, and snorted.

"Once upon a time," he began dramatically, sitting up and doing as she asked, "you'd have whispered in my ear for me to take them off."

"Mmhmm," she murmured. "Before we had a three-year-old about to barge in."

She had hardly finished when the door opened slowly and Zozy pranced in, followed by Jaina, dragging a blanket with her and yawning sleepily. Zozy immediately hopped on the bed and came to lay up against Leia's back, so he could easily peer into Noura's cradle.

Jaina ambled over to Han and leaned sideways against the bed, rubbing one eye and staring up at him.

Leia reached behind her and grabbed the top she'd discarded earlier. She slipped it on deftly, and nodded to Han. Han picked Jaina up and tossed her gently on the bed.

"I want to sleep in here," Jaina said.

"Only if you don't snore," Han said seriously, getting back into bed.

Jaina threw herself down next to Leia.

"I not snore," she informed him darkly. "_You_ snore."

"No, you snore," Han argued.

"_Daddy_! YOU SNORE!"

"Shhh," Leia whispered, running her fingers through Jaina's hair.

Jaina waited for Han to settle back in, and then rolled towards him and laid her head on his shoulder.

"_You snore_," she grumbled, wanting the last word.

Han grinned over her head at Leia, and Leia smiled contently, giving in to a yawn. She resisted sleep for the moment, because she sensed Noura would be up soon, fussing to nurse – and with all of them snuggled up in here, the bed was crowded, but it was something Leia would cherish, preserve as a memory for years to come, because the time apart made _this_ sort of thing well worth it.

* * *

_-alexandra_

_story #397_


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